Today on the Street: 1st December, 2008

Leann waits outside Underworld for Tony and Carla to arrive. When they drive up, he asks Carla if this is how it's going to be, him at work all day and her out shopping. Heh, as if she'd trust him to run her factory.

She asks if he's going to be in the office all day, and he wonders why she wants to know. She tells him if he stays there, he just might find out. Not even married, and already she's keeping secrets. Tony goes inside and Carla and Leann jaunt off.

Leann asks her what the secret is. Is she going to jump on a plane to Barbados while he's stuck in the office? Carla says if she were planning on running away, she wouldn't be about to spend an obscene amount of money on a new wedding dress, would she?

Maria greets the two of them in passing and asks if Carla's all set for tomorrow. Carla checks to make sure Maria IS coming to the wedding. Maria says she's looking forward to it.

Carla tells Leann she's glad Maria didn't ask where they were going. The last thing she wants to do is talk to her about a wedding dress.

Steve sneaks into the house while on the phone with Becky. Operation: Bad Boyfriend begins this morning. He promises her he'll make it work. He hangs up as his mum walks by.

Liz asks him if he realizes that SHE got up to take Amy to school this morning. Steve tells her he just had to get out of there for a half hour. He's had it up to here with Michelle and her parents. Liz is surprised to hear this. She'd have thought he'd be happy they were here. They've certainly perked Michelle up. That's his point exactly. With him, Michelle's miserable, but with mummy and daddy here, she's all smiles. What does that tell you? Liz explains to him that Michelle's had a lot to deal with lately, and she's had to keep it together in front of Ryan. Having her parents here helps to spread the load.

She lets Steve know that Barry and Helen want to have a farewell drink with everyone later. “ANOTHER one?!” asks Steve. Yeah, Steve, what DO they think this is, a pub?? Steve's worried the regular customers are going to think it's all private parties nowadays, but Liz tells him that Barry and Helen create a lovely atmosphere, unlike SOME people. She wants to know what's up with Steve. Has somebody said something to upset him? He says there's nothing wrong. They'll give them a good send-off.

Aww! Simon doesn't want to go to his first day at school. Peter tells him he's got to go. Does Simon want to be thick like him? He sees Ken and Dierdre coming over and makes a last second effort to bribe Simon with a burger after school. It doesn't work.

Peter tells them that he doesn't want to go. Ken tells Simon he'll love it at school. He'll get to see his cousin Amy, and his friend Joshua Peacock, and he'll make lots of other friends. They'll be doing all sorts of things for Christmas, and there will be a party in a week or so. This gets Simon ALL excited, and he jumps into the car.

Peter thanks his dad for helping out.

Sally's making tea for all the girls at work, when Rosie approaches. She asks her daughter how it feels to be back at work. Rosie says it's good to have things back to normal.

She tells her mother she's been sworn to secrecy, but they've asked her to be in charge while Tony takes Carla on a surprise honeymoon trip. Sally can't believe it. Rosie doesn't have the experience, the... anything... to run this place. It should be someone more mature, someone who the girls respect.

Jed delivers Norris a plain brown package which turned up on their doorstep. He's curious about the secrets it holds, but Norris says it's private. Jed jokingly suggests it's from his “girlfriend.” Norris assures him that his relationship with Mary is purely platonic. Jed bets a lass that age takes some keeping up with. Rita tells him that if it doesn't work out, he can always adopt her.

Tony comes into the Kabin, and Jed makes his attack. He's been waiting to bump into Tony. He introduces himself and asks if Tony remembers him, or has he thrown too many sick old men out of their homes, tossed out all their belongings, and left them to die. Is that why he can't recognize him?

Tony tells him his recollection is quite different. He hardly left him to die. He called the ambulance. Jed tells him he's alive and well and living on Tony's doorstep. They've got unfinished business. Tony tells Norris he'll come back later.

Tony goes outside and runs into Barry Connor. Barry greets him warmly and tells him his bride is a grand girl. They're having a farewell drink tonight at the Rovers, and he'd love for the two of them to come. It'll take his mind off tomorrow, and give Helen a chance to make up with Carla. She regrets some of the things she said after Liam's funeral.

Jed comes over to the two of them and warns Barry to watch it. If he stands there too long, Tony will have his wallet. Barry looks questioningly at the two of them and starts to laugh. Tony tells him he and Carla will be there tonight.

Tony asks Jed what he wants. Jed says he wants his house back, his life back, and his cat back. Tony tells him they had a deal. He gave Jed a check, and he cashed it. Tony turns to leave, and Jed grabs his arm. Tony robbed him when he was ill. Jed wants more. He wants a decent price for everything he took.

Tony tells him to take his “disgusting” hands off him, and warns him never to come near him again. Jed tells Tony he's not scared of him. He'll see him around. “And next time, bring your checkbook!”

Leann follows Carla into the Rovers. Carla asks her what she's having to drink, and Leann isn't so sure she wants to drink with her at all. Michelle and Carla look confused, so Leann explains to Michelle that Carla is a disgrace to woman-kind. Michelle's interested at this. Leann tells them they went out to buy a wedding dress, and hearing this, Liz comes over. Now she's interested too.

Leann explains to them that when you go looking for a wedding dress, you go to all the shops in Manchester, and a few beyond. You look at all the possible wedding dresses, and a few impossible ones as well. You take your time. Carla picked out the first dress in the first shop they went to. Michelle and Liz discuss whether they have a case to ban Carla from the pub.

Carla defends herself. It's a beautiful dress, and it suits her. Leann says she doesn't have any argument with that, but her shoes and bag were also bought in record time. Carla asks why she should waste time and risk losing the dress she wants. Michelle and Liz tell her you ask them to save it for you, and then you check the rest of the city and beyond, and THEN you go back to the first one.

Carla gives up and admits she's guilty as charged. As her punishment, she agrees to buy them all a drink. Leann tells them she's right, though. She does look stunning. They both look sickened.

Tony sits quietly in his office contemplating things, when Rosie comes to the door and tells him there's someone here to see him. Tony tells her to tell the “old fool” to get lost. If he won't, call the police.

The door opens all the way, and the man standing there tells her he may be a fool, but he's much younger than Tony. It's his brother Pat! Tony runs over to give his little brother a big hug.

Tony introduces his brother to Rosie Webster, the power behind the thrown. She does her best seductive act, and goes to get them a tea and a coffee.

Tony realizes his brother must be Carla's big surprise. Pat says she rang him a couple days back. He figured if she looked anything like she sounded, this was one he'd have to meet. Tony assures him that she does.

Pat says that if Tony's not ashamed of her, there must be some reason he wasn't invited to their wedding. Tony explains to him that Carla sprang this all on him at the last minute. Pat assumes maybe Tony thought he'd still be upset with him over dumping him as his best man the last time around, though Pat says he should probably be relieved, considering what happened to his replacement.

[Side Note: During their first attempt at a wedding, Tony called Pat and told him he was going to have Liam be his best man instead. This was all part of Tony's plot to off Liam. Pat doesn't know why Tony changed his mind. Tony told everyone else he'd had a fight with his brother, and THAT'S why he'd chosen Liam as his best man.]

At the bookies, Jed explains to Peter that betting's one of those things. No matter how long you've been doing it, you never get better at it... like understanding women.

Leann comes in, and Peter tells her she's a life saver. He asks her if she'd mind keeping an eye on Simon for a half hour.

Simon's playing with his favorite toy. His mummy bought it for him before she died. Leann asks him how school went today. He says it was alright. She tells him it'll be better tomorrow, cuz he won't be the new kid anymore, and he'll make lots of new friends.

Peter comes up and asks if he can buy Leann a drink to thank her for helping out. She tells him it won't be necessary. She'll be in the pub anyway. She asks him what he's going to do with Simon, and Peter says he'll see if Ashley can look after him. He asks Simon if he fancies playing with Ashley's son Josh later, and Simon looks really excited.

Leann corrects Peter and tells him he really should make sure it's okay first. You don't want to get Simon's hopes up. If Ashley can't do it, he's going to be disappointed. Peter agrees, and apologizes. It's like he keeps telling her, she's a natural.

Becky hops into the front seat of Steve's cab and asks him to take her to the airport. She was lying in bed all night thinking how great it would be if they could just get away, just the two of them, away from all this... stuff. He tells her that's nothing compared to what HE was lying in bed thinking about, if you know what I mean.

“...With Michelle?” she asks. Well yeah, but it wasn't like that. Becky cringes. She promised herself she wouldn't say that.

It's like Steve told her on the phone. He's really starting to get on Michelle's nerves. So it won't be long before... well, before he's living in this cab. Becky gets all excited and asks him what he did. He tells her he ignored her when she said good morning, and he complained a bit when she said her mum and dad wanted a farewell party.

Becky wouldn't exactly call that “bad.” Some fellas, if they behaved like that, she'd be expecting a proposal. Steve tells her he'll try a bit harder then.

Becky says she's not so sure about this whole being horrible to Michelle thing. She hasn't done anything, and well... she's her mate. Steve promises her it won't be for long. Michelle will soon decide it's not worth carrying on, and then people won't look at Becky and think she's stolen somebody else's fella.

“Or that you're a two timing scumbag?” she asks. He tells her to trust him.

Norris has opened his mystery package. It's a new phone. First prize in a competition. He was hoping to win second prize, a foot spa with massage function. Rita tells him he's too clever for his own good, and he agrees.

Rosie comes in and sees the phone. She tells them it's THE “in” phone. It has everything: mp3 player, radio, streaming video. Norris asks why they can't make a phone that just makes phone calls. She asks who would want one of those.

Norris' other phone starts ringing. He's got a message from Mary. SHE won the foot spa.

In the Rovers, Pat thanks Carla again for inviting him. She admits that she had to check what she was marrying into. He says if it were up to Tony, he'd still be sat on his own over in Scotland drinking whiskey from a chipped mug. Tony jokes that he can only expect that Pat will shatter everyone's illusions about him.

Maria and Helen come in. Tony asks Pat to order the drinks so he and Carla can go and say hello. Carla asks if they really have to.

Helen tells Maria that if she wants to come visit them for Christmas, she'd be more than welcome. Maria thanks her and tells her she might. Helen just wants to make sure she's not on her own.

Michelle comes out with a tray of champagne... and an orange juice for Maria of course.

Helen thanks Carla for coming, and she thanks Helen for the invite. She tries to apologize to Carla for the words they exchanged after the funeral, but Carla interrupts her and tells her it's already forgotten. It was a difficult time for all of them.

Helen hands them both a glass and wishes them the very best. Barry says the buzz of a wedding even gets to the heart of an old cynic like him. By the way... where's Steve. Liz says he's around here somewhere, and Helen tries to tell her husband that he lacks a certain subtlety.

Barry tells her Liz knows what he means, and Michelle says EVERYONE knows what he means. Barry leaves it up to the two of them to put a little subtle pressure on Steve. Helen says Steve's already given her her present, knowing Michelle's happier than she's ever seen her.

Becky's been listening the whole time, and tells Liz she's going to take her break now.

Ken and Dierdre enter and order a couple drinks. He notices Peter's sat over in a booth, and wonders where Simon is.

Leann comes in behind them and seeing Peter, she smiles. She heads over to him to check that Ashley'd taken Simon. Peter says he did, no problem. He invites her to sit down for a drink, and she accepts.

Watching Tony and his clan, Kevin Webster wonders if anyone has ever choked to death on champagne. Sally tells him not to be horrible.

Jed overhears this, and asks Kevin if he's really not a fan of Tony's either. Kevin says he wouldn't pour his drink on Tony if he were on fire. Jed says he's gotten to this age without ever really hating anybody, then Tony came along.

Becky finds Steve outside alone, and asks what he's doing. He says he's getting some fresh air, but she says it's a smoking shelter, fresh air isn't an option. She offers him her cigarette, and he declines.

She congratulates him on his forthcoming wedding, and he wonders what she means. She tells him he's a coward when it comes to stuff like this. Did he not have the nerve to actually dump her, or was he just going to hang on to her for a big longer? He asks her to please tell him what on Earth she's going on about.

She tells him that apart from the groom, everybody in there is planning his wedding. Michelle's just about bought the dress. All this talk about leaving her...

He assures her that IS going to happen. All this wedding talk has nothing to do with him. That's why he's out here. He's had it with all of them.

Becky tells him she knows what his game is. In there, he says he wants to be with Michelle, and out here he says he wants to be with her, when what he really means is he wants to be with her... in BED. He says of course he does... but she does too. She admits it, but when Steve's a free man, and NOT before. She doesn't want to be his bit on the side, sneaking away with him behind Michelle's back. He says she makes it sound so sleazy, and she tells him he best get cracking with this bad boyfriend campaign if he wants to get any.

Leann wonders whether she or Peter have the most to lose here... I mean they both have quite the reputation. Peter points out that she's still here, and what's the shame in having a few drinks with a colleague?

She goes to get another round, and Ken and Dierdre come over. Ken tells him he was wondering where Simon was. Peter pretends to not know who he's talking about, and then jokes that he's safe at home alone, playing with a box of matches. Dierdre tells him his dad was only asking, and Peter admits he's over at Ashley's playing with the boys. That's all Ken wanted to know.

Dierdre asks how things went at school, and Peter says he enjoyed himself, and he's talking about going back tomorrow. Ken seems happy and tells Peter to enjoy his drink.

Leann asks Carla if she's doing okay. She wishes she hadn't come. All anyone can talk about is Liam. Leann says there's bound to be reminders as long as she's around here, and Carla reckons things might change when her name is Carla Gordon.

Barry comes over and steals Carla away. He puts his arm around her and tells her how happy he is for her.

Leann whispers over to Michelle and asks if she can organize a toast for Carla and Tony. She says she'll go get some more champagne.

Jed tells Kevin and Sally that Tony managed to frighten all his neighbors away, but he wasn't going to move. Sally says he DID move out though. Jed explains to them that he had a stroke, and as soon as he was in the hospital, Tony brought his thugs in, tossed all his stuff out on the street, and boarded his house up. Sally and Kevin are appalled to hear this.

Kevin looks over at Tony and asks if his ears are burning. He tells Kevin if he's worrying about what to get him as a wedding present, don't bother... that is if he can make the wedding. “Miss out on a chance to eat and drink at your expense? Don't think so.”

Sally promises him Kevin will be on his best behavior, and Tony asks how she'd ever know. Jed suggests maybe he should come along too and let everyone know what a charmer the groom REALLY is.

Pat gives Maria his condolences on her loss. Everyone speaks so highly of Liam. She thanks him and tells him she's glad he and Tony finally made up. Pat's confused. Made up? They'd never fallen out. Tony hears this, and looks over at them, worried. Maria tells him that's why Tony asked Liam to be his best man. Pat tells her there must be some mistake. Tony swoops in and pulls Pat away.

Leann calls for everyone's attention.

Tony explains to his brother that Maria's a grieving widow, and to pay no attention to her.

Leann asks everyone to raise their glasses to the happy couple, Tony and Carla.